2 h1p$t3r 4 Lyfe

    hi. $omtim3z i thnk im ju$t 2 d33p 4 s0cyity. n0 on3 c@n accept me, bc my cl0thes are 2 retro, and my raybands t00 swagalicious. i lyke 2 spew incorrect fact$ ab0ut lyfe & politics to conceal the fact that im tru1y ign0rant. due 2 all the pre$$ure my p33rs and culture put 0n my naturally pr0minent $houlderz, i feel the need t0 adapt my personality 2 please whoever im with, de$pite what G0d GaGa te11s me. i mean itz only natura1... annimals adapt to their enviroment, and arent we animals t00? woah. th@t was profound. hehe.
   i mode1 my ta$te in musique based on what is on the urb@n 0utfitt3rs viny1 shelf. 0r really obscure indie bands who are obsecure 4 a reason. and s0metimes i quote cl@ssic literary works that ive never read, but thats ju$t the artist within c0ming 2 lyfe.
  peop1e try 2 supre$$ my creativity, b/c im just 2 different. IT$ N0T MY FULT! I WAS B0RN TH1S W@Y!
   i sm0ke cigarettes cause weed iz 2 mainstream. s0 is prof pics of you smi1ing. s000000 c1iche. i drink coffee even tho i hate, hence i only order a mocha fr0pa latte smoothie.
   i pretend im stupid and i re@lly am. i wear glasses that were uncool even when our grandparents were kids. jeez. the world gets me down.
4 the record im not h1pster, i avoid labels.

- dah coolest kid on dah retro block

Raunchy Rendezvous

     The original Starbucks Man has been replaced, and a newer, less 'bad-boy' character has taken his place. Considering kidnapping him. Ha. Kidding! .... I'm not.
     Or maybe I'll just seduce him with my eloquence (WARNING: From this point on, this post is no longer PG): "You always make my coffee extra hot." ; "Foam my coffee, please." ; "Can I chew your biscotti?" That's all I've got... for now. >:)

Your faithful blogster, Jacob.
   

Rambling the Year Away

    2011? Very good year. Made incredible friends, saw fantastic movies, and learned a lot. With all this confidence, I feel as though I can take over the world. I'LL STAND ON TOP OF A GIANT TRUFFLE AND MAKE THE PEONS SUBMIT. Ha. Kidding. Sorta.
    Quick random, non-relating sentences about this year: A Godia Rewards Card work in any state. James Mcavoy and I have been together a year now. Acting can be fun. Acting can suck. Helen Mirren is a goddess. Jane Campion is a master filmmaker. Redheads are cooler than everyone else. So are lesbians. Gay people are not cooler than everyone else. Did you know herpes never goes away? Everyone should create a club. My cats are from heaven. Icecream is good, until you begin to see the consequences gathering in your gut area. Plasma TVs are overrated.

Now my advice to the world? Simple:
Listen to music as loud as you can. Go outside when the wind is blowing, it's magical. Make as many friends as you can. Fantasy about attractive people. Don't stay hung up on one person, because you're fantastic, and there is another person around the corner. Make eye contact with strangers. Dance as much as you can. And most importantly, never hide a smile or a cackle. Maybe they will smile and cackle with you.

Thank you for listening to this rambling mad man for nearly a whole year.... your faithful blogster, Jacob.